I'm finally sober! My life up until I really got sober was in one word, chaotic! I didn't know what stability was. To top off my mess of a childhood, I went straight into a marriage with more abuse and alcoholism. But, what I have today is who I am, who I've become, I am with an amazing (new) husband, we have 4 kids and our fur-baby.
It has not been an easy road but I can say it was worth every fight and tear it took to get me here.
Sharing my journey with you and my past is not to display it all over the place but to help someone relate to what has happened and where my mind has been while I was drinking and where it is today. Its to give insight to those suffering that if you just keep fighting you can really have the best life you were meant to have.
Let's do this!
When I was about 10, I told my dad one day as he was digging a huge trench for hedges around our new home, I told him I was bored! Man, was that a mistake. He looked at me and said, “You have a bike, a pool everything you want, and you’re bored”? “Ya, I said, “I dont want to do any of that.” He told me to grab a shovel and start digging and fill up the wheelbarrow, when I was full to take it down the road. Down the road wasn’t just 2 houses down, it was a good jaunt and I think I did about 10 loads. I was exhausted and made a mental note that day to never tell my dad I was bored.
Today however I sometimes get into a funk where I want to do so many things but can’t seem to get the motivation. Then, I feel bored! What is that? I don’t enjoy those days but I know they will pass.
My parents. Well, let’s see, I’m 55 now, so when they were my age now I was 35.
My mom was and is still married to her husband and they were still working and still going out any chance they could on a Saturday night. Funny, because that’s when my mom and stepfather gave the drink up too, soon after we partied one last time. What a night it was, so so fun! We sang all night long taking turns with the karaoke, we danced all night and eventually closed the bar. We were all so hungover. My mom and stepfather swore they’d never drink again. Although they miss it, they never did drink again. They were so full of life. Today, my stepfather is drastically broken down physically and is mostly bed ridden. My mom is still spunky but slower. Im sure she has one more party in her, a drink free party that is.
Me and Mom
My dad, he was living in Florida and had a successful business, a beautiful home on the canal with a Bertram Yaght and on his 4th wife. Yup! Forth wife! Anyways, he was happy, successful and seemed like he had it all. We were very close and I flew down every chance I could to spend time with him. He worked hard and played hard. He was a young 55, and even though he ran a business he didn’t have a problem staying up partying in his games room with whoever showed up. He rode Harleys and played the character well. He loved racing down the street in his Corvette when the right opportunity came. He never got past the age of 19, he stayed young. Both my parents stayed young, and im happy to have inherited that quality of character.
Ironic this question was asked today. My father was put on life support one year ago tomorrow due to a severe heart attack awaiting surgery. He was taken off February 19th 2025.
Today has been a rather sad day. I’ve been thinking of my dad and all the times we shared laughing and having a blast but also turbulence during those years. The speed of time, the moments, the glimpse of another time now gone.
I often reflect about them being at this age, then this age, them at my age at 55.
I now know why my mom did certain lifestyle changes at 55, but at 35, I didn’t quite get it.
I also know that my dad should have changed his lifestyle way before his 4th wife but it wasn’t up too me. I did however have conversations with him asking, telling him to change.
He passed away married to his 5th wife but very sick and unhappy. Rest his soul.
Looking where they are now and knowing in 20 years I will be my moms age, first is crazy, but second, I’m going to take care of myself and enjoy every single day I have, as I do now but do better, be better and stay young ❤️
Hello fellow warrior’s! I hope you’re all doing well. I want to ask this question for some feedback and opinions.
While I was doing my morning scroll sitting with my coffee and pup, I came across a reel about trauma being inherited. It made me go, hmmm????
Could it be inherited? I know for a fact trauma is passed down. We all know that, but could it be passed down genetically?
Part of me thinks possibly, not due to genetics but subconscious. During pregnancy as your baby is developing, the brain is developing, so if you have a stressful, abusive, unsupportive pregnancy are those emotions transferred through you to your baby? Even though our memories are not there when we enter the world until our toddler years and beyond, but, what about our subconscious? Is it in there somewhere we can’t access but only demonstrate leaving those around us in shock for the behavior and wondering why they acted out this way? 🤔 Is it a gene, like alcoholism, or is it in our subconscious brain in the womb?
I’ve been victim to parents who have unresolved trauma and never seeked therapy. Was my trauma more than what it is because I’ve also inherited both of my parents trauma?
I don’t know the answer to that but I’m interested in what others think about this too.
In Italy their first taste of alcohol is at the dining room table with the family having wine, a sip or a gulp. Or giving your baby boy a beer for a photo or just to see him sip like a big boy. It’s very hard for some families, people, to understand what could be the consequences of that first sip. It is also very hard for some to see the effects of alcohol when it doesn’t affect them directly. It’s a complicated disease that many do not fully understand.
My first taste of alcohol was at the age of 9. My grandparents, mom and dad and I were at a lake having so much fun. Dad was chasing my stepmom around the picnic table trying to capture her to throw her in the lake. My grandfather was enjoying his beer laughing as they ran around, yelling, get er Bob, get er! My Nan and I were also laughing and encouraging my mom to run away! As we sat and watched, my Nana turned to me and asked if I wanted to taste a little cherry brandy. Of course I said yes, If she was drinking it it must be good, but I also knew that there was alcohol in it, Something kids can’t have. An adult drink. I tried it but I can’t remember if I liked it or not, I just knew it was wrong. I never had another drink until grade 9. It was wine of course. White wine. I felt exhilarated, free, and so much more alive.
As I got older and more comfortable with it, with the feeling, I loved it. I was having so much fun! I wasn’t shy anymore, I could engage in conversations and meet new people. Blah blah blah right.
So my question is, did that one drink set the stage? Did it leave a taste for more at that age? I liked it then but I was a child so when I was older and knew I liked it did that make me indulge more?
I don’t think so, but I know it is not wise for my grandmother to offer me alcohol at age 9.
How do significant life events or the passage of time influence your perspective on life?
The passing of time has been on my mind recently, losing my father almost a year ago, feeling like it went so fast. Missing him.
Thinking of how my mom is getting up there at 76, while she stills seems so young to me. Her voice is young but I can slightly hear little bits of age, we meet at the mall and I can see how tired she gets now. All day shopping is long behind us. Its then I realize she’s getting older. She is young at heart and that’s what keeps her spunky and alive. When we laugh on the phone its like we are so young.
I appreciate the time I have on earth and being able to get older. I can hang out with our kids and watch them with their kids, having grandchildren watching them grow and be young enough to play and indulge a bit. I never take for granted that it could be my last time. I thank God everyday for the life I have and the time im given.
Life events that have happened. This one is very close to home, as they say. I was speaking of the mall earlier, how mom and I would meet up, I would go there as a teenager and hang out but its not the same anymore. Its not a place to hang out anymore because if you do you look suspicious. The mall where I meet my mom is in Newmarket, Ontario, it had been robbed, smash and grab, THREE, 3 times in a month!
Then my son and wife were at the mall in Barrie, Ontario and a kiosk got robbed!! Right in front of them. They had their, my grandson with them who’s a baby!!! I mean what is happening. I hate what is happening to our communities and Countries. When will the madness end. I’m nervous now when my mom says she’s going to the mall. I tell her to be aware, always have your phone ready to grab, always check your surroundings.
We all have to be safe. But try to stay positive at the same time and try not to give in to the anger or ignorance of others. Listen and pay attention. Keep your faith and smile at someone when you walk by, say thank you when someone holds the door for you. Together we win
This is a good question. One of my most scariest thing to do is putting myself out there. Putting myself in the lime light in front of millions of people scrolling through social media. opening myself up to opinions and negative feedback. Telling my deep secrets but also possibly helping so many others by doing what I’m terrified to do.
I’m an outgoing spontaneous person but not one that likes to be focused on or center of attention. It’s the first of anything new that makes us nervous.
What it would take for me to do it would be to just do it. Stop listening to the voices in my head and start listening to the people and supporters that keep telling me to share my story. Stop the fear of the unknown.
Part of why I am scared or nervous to start is that there are more people involved in my story than just me and I don’t want to hurt anyone by sharing.
The artwork in this post was created by me, KPZ Art. It’s a hobby I discovered during my sobriety journey. It’s amazing what you can achieve when you’re living your best life!
I think everyone has fantasized winning the big one! I know I have. What I would do.
First I’d help family, then I would open a beautiful sobriety home. One that offered everything and more. One that feels like a place you want to come to heal, a place that offers everything One needs to heal and get back intouch with themselves. A place where you feel welcome and not just another patient or case number. I would make it affordable for anyone.
I think I would build the home in the mountains with ocean views. Somewhere private yet close to amenities. Somewhere where, patients can sit by the water or go mountain climbing. I’d also like to have animals on site, such as dogs and horses to give people comfort that animals can give sometimes better than humans.
Ive dreamed of this for many years. Whether it becomes a reality for me depends on the numbers I choose or the quick Pic numbers drawn!
Write about your first name: its meaning, significance, etymology, etc.
My name, Kelly was given to me from my moms brother, my Uncle Doug. My mom told me the name she originally wanted for me and I’m happy my Uncle stepped in.
Here is the meaning of my name Kelly.
The name Kelly has Irish origins, stemming from the Gaelic surname Ó Ceallaigh, and means “descendant of Ceallach”. The personal name Ceallach itself has several interpretations, often linked to “bright-headed,” “war,” or “strife,” and sometimes “one who frequents churches,” making Kelly a unisex name symbolizing strength, brightness, and Irish heritage.
It also stands for warrior, fighter and strength.
Its ironic in a way because when I do great people on here I’ve always used the word, warrior, fellow warrior’s. Warrior’s over the power of alcohol and the fight within myself to get sober and the strength to stay sober!
My name is just a glimpse of who I truly am and what I, Kelly stand for.
The first thing that came to mind was clearing my mind. Clearing my mind of clutter, intrusive thoughts and self sabotage.
I’ve been practicing my breath work and literally giving my head a shake when those thoughts would come.
Last year I had a lot of peace come into my life. My father passed. I know that sounds terrible but there’s a lot of hurt and betrayal that had happened when he was here. We did see each other and make amends just before he passed. Thank God.
So, Ive been able to get most of the clutter out of my mind and working on the rest. Its freeing to be at peace and declutter your mind.
Don’t stress about yesterday or tomorrow, today is all we have 💙
Of course my favorite animal are dogs. My dog Gracie is a golden retriever and a joy to have.
Dogs have always brought me emotional well-being and support, especially during the beginning of my journey being alcohol free. Molly was also a retriever and she did an amazing job with me. She knew what I needed and she delivered with angel wings.
Gracie, is a cuddle bug and fun! She is such a bundle of happiness. When things go aray in my life she’s there to comfort too.
All animals are special in their own way and I am a lover of all, but dogs take the win for me.
Being Me Sober 