Author: beingmesober

I'm finally sober! My life up until I really got sober was in one word, chaotic! I didn't know what stability was. To top off my mess of a childhood, I went straight into a marriage with more abuse and alcoholism. But, what I have today is who I am, who I've become, I am with an amazing (new) husband, we have 4 kids and our fur-baby. It has not been an easy road but I can say it was worth every fight and tear it took to get me here. Sharing my journey with you and my past is not to display it all over the place but to help someone relate to what has happened and where my mind has been while I was drinking and where it is today. Its to give insight to those suffering that if you just keep fighting you can really have the best life you were meant to have. Let's do this!
Leisure, Mental Health

Is a little chaos good for us?

beingmesober

Is a little chaos actually good for us?

What a question! I’ve lived a life of chaos pretty much for 40 years until I got sober and could pull myself from the cause of the continued chaos. Was it good for me? No. Not constant chaos so you don’t know which way is up. Chaos makes our minds function very differently. Everything feels rushed, no time to realize what’s actually going on. You can’t focus, sleep, or live a functioning life in constant chaos.

My mind never rested, it was going constantly.  My emotions were on high and I could never completely settle. I had night terrors since I was a child and was continously anxious. Expecting the drop.

Now I have very little chaos and some may say it’s a boring life keeping to myself and having a small group of friends.  Family  members or friends who bring a certain chaos to my life are at a distance. I absolutely love our quiet life. I am calm and can think clearly without all the other rukess circling around.

Some chaos I guess can stir up a bit of excitement and let us appreciate our quiet life that much more, but too much of anything is never good.

There will always be a bit of chaos no matter what we do to stop it. There will always be bumps ahead but it’s how we handle the chaos when we are faced with it. Calm cool and collected.

So when life is going smooth expect a little splash of chaos to show up and get a little crazy. Let it ruffle your hair and put us in high gear knowing that it will soon pass. When it’s over we sit and let out a deep breath and really appreciate where we are when times are quiet.

Leisure

My favorite blogger?

beingmesober

Who is your favorite blogger to follow?

I don’t have one favorite blogger. I enjoy every blogger who takes the time to write and free them selves of what is taking up space in their minds. I enjoy knowing and reading the other views people have, not just one. I enjoy the creativity and style of certain bloggers but wouldn’t call them favorite. 

Keep blogging, keep sharing, keep the lines of communication open.

Leisure

Recap of yesterday’s step count!

beingmesober

Well peeps I actually got to 13,456 steps yesterday!!

What a day! Air Canada cancelled our flight to Regina yesterday due to “maintenance” so we had to reroute. Hopped on West Jet with a connector to Calgary, just a quick flight over Regina then get back on another plane to go back another hour and a half to Regina. Whatever it takes to get to our kids right! Keeping her updated as the day progresses.

Okay, we’re on our way to see our daughter and grandbabes just a bit later but we will get there. Not so fast! There was a medical emergency on our flight and was delayed an hour!!! Ohhhh no! Will we miss our connection in Calgary?

As we all got off the plane, some happy to be home, or their Calgary trip for the Stampede this weekend, oh ya that too, others wondering if they will make their connections.

We walked and walked through the airport to our connection gate, we could see our plane, thank god phew. Nope, sorry, says the ticket agent, you’ll have to get on the 11pm flight. Ohhhhh my gosh! Its 3 hr difference from Ontario to Calgary, I’ve been up since 5:30am and it’s now midnight our time. We are tired but wired and frustrated. Its still daylight at 10pm.

We go get our new boarding passes and end up staying the night at the Marriot. Another airport walk around from one end of the airport to the other. But in the back of my mind I’m getting all my steps in. I have to report back to all my fellow bloggers 😁.

I have to say though, I really like Calgary. Well the airport, the vibes. When we walked into the hotel to check in, with a restaurant surrounding the check in desk, I felt like we were walking right into Dutton Ranch! All the cowboy hats and saddles laid out as decor. I actually wish we were all staying here this weekend, but must get back on the plane for our final destination.

Even though yesterday was delayed and frustrating, we knew we’d get there eventually 🙃.  What’s a little pit stop at a place we’ve never been. One for the books!

I did manage to get 13,456 steps in yesterday which is awesome 👌!

Off we go! Too Regina. Too our kids!

Mental Health

Steps today!!

beingmesober

Hit 5,000 steps today and drop your achievement here — we’re cheering you on!

Sorry peeps, can’t partake today! I’ll be on a flight going to see our daughter and grandbabies in Saskatchewan!! Meeting our newest one today.

Will check in later and drop how many steps I did get today!

Happy walking 🚶‍♀️ ✨️

Mental Health

The best way to deal with negative thoughts.

beingmesober

What’s the best way to deal with negative thoughts?

Those intrusive thoughts and self sabotage. We’ve covered this ground before. One little thing can trigger the whirlwind of negativity in your mind. Sometimes lasting only for a few minutes other times it can crumble us.

I use to drown my negative thoughts with alcohol. NOT a good idea! I would be miserable and walk around angry all day and take it out on people around me.

My husband is a great supporter and knows just by looking at me that I’m off. He immediately senses it and asks what’s wrong, if I’m having a bad day or hormones going haywire. I try to say, no, I’m fine or nothing because I hate the attention or pity. Then to realize when I do talk about it I feel a lot better. Took a long time to learn that. I harbored feelings which lead to drinking and being very unhappy inside.

Ive learned to sit with the feelings, analyze and just think. I’m a deep thinker and really try to understand why I feel the way I do at the moment. Sometimes I chat to myself and tell myself that I’m being ridiculous and to snap out of it! Get up and get shit done. Stop the pity party. 

I’ve also tried breath work. Deep breath in hold for 6 seconds and let out a big breath and continue with saying release. Release all the negative thoughts with that big breath out. Believe me, it works!

One of the best ways I get rid of negative thoughts is to pray.

I ask you lord to be released of these negative thoughts and cover me in your light.  Take what does not serve me and fill me with purity, good thoughts and love.

Thoughts come and go like a dark cloud. Let it pass over and know, this too shall pass.

Art on front page is done by me! Kpz Art 🎨

Leisure, Mental Health

What I love now, but hated at a younger age.

beingmesober

What do you love now, that you hated when you were younger?

WEEDING! I hated weeding when I was younger.

When I was 11 Is when my stepmom taught me how to weed the garden. It was the last thing on earth I wanted to be doing. I wanted to be swimming, or hanging out in my room or playing with friends, certainly not weeding my parents garden. Like, why couldn’t they just do it. Huffing and puffing along the way. My mom never gave in though.  She made me finish the entire gardens. The gardens seemed to be so big and take so long to do.

Today, however I’m grateful for those days I hated weeding because it taught me how to take care of my own garden when the day came. I do think back to that still when I’m gardening and give a little thoughtful shout out to my parents for teaching me, and the patience to suffer through my pouting and carrying on during those times.

I can also say I’m a little anal when it comes to my garden. It has to have proper placement, colour and low maintenance perennials. Minimal weed growth. When I do have to weed and maintain the grounds, I find it relaxing. I can go into my own world and tell my plants how beautiful they are! Weird? Human touch stimulates plants and talking to them or having music close to them. They feel the vibration from our voices and the music, the energy we give when touching. 

So, thanks mom for all those lessons that I thought would ruin my life. 🫶👊

When I sit back on my front porch or backyard deck I look at my gardens and smile because they are beautiful and I’m proud of my hard work and of course lessons learned, not just about weeding but about appreciating and taking care of what you have.

Happy Earthing!

Leisure, Mental Health

A time I followed my gut and it turned out exactly right?

beingmesober

What’s a time you followed your gut and it turned out to be exactly right?

I would have to say, my gut tells me when to list and where to buy real estate. I’ve somehow had an intuition for just the right time to list our properties and what price point for a fair and quick sell, as well as what area to purchase in. We’ve never over paid or under sold.

It is more than just my gut, it’s doing a lot of  research, driving by communities to see what the area is like, looking into recent solds and checking out what’s listed and for what price and how long its been on the market. Those are all factors.

Overall though, it could be a great neighborhood, the perfect home and my gut will tell me if something is off about the home or the area. I’m able to see a lot of things people may skim over, and I try to stay tuned to my energy. When it comes to living in a home you don’t want bad juju!!

It’s difficult to know when to trust your intuition or “gut” but, 9 times out of 10 our gut is not wrong.

Listen to your body and and gut. Just remember to feed it well!

Mental Health

What media changed how I see the world?

beingmesober

What’s a piece of media (book, movie, song) that changed how you see the world?

The song that that changed the way I see, not necessarily the world, but the world around me.

I Can See Clearly Now, by Johnny Nash. I know the song and knew it before it impacted my life when I got sober. It took awhile for me to see clearly.

When I was deep in recovery and this song played it was one of my sobriety songs. I could see clearly now, the rain has gone, I could see all obstacles in my way, no more dark clouds.

It hit every ounce of me and what I had tolerated, accepted blindly and the way I was numbing myself to the world that I could have. The people who I could see clearly, no blinders on anymore and no more tolerance from what was hurting me deeply emotionally. I didn’t want those dark clouds, the secrets and pretending to be someone I wasn’t.

Sobriety showed me another side of the world we live in. I don’t have to drink to forget what life or the world had done to me and the people I love. I didn’t have to live in fight or flight mode. I didn’t have to carry the secrets that I held for so many years to protect someone who wasn’t willing to change or accept accountability. 

Music is my therapy. I feel it in my soul and sing to the heavens. My parents always loved music and played it all the time. I heard the song many many times but it hit differently when I changed and boy did that song resonate!

Another song is A Wonderful World. It is a wonderful world when you see clearly.

Some messages we get while here on earth are meant just for you.

Leisure

What languages I speak and how it’s impacted my life?

beingmesober

Which languages do you speak and how did that impact your life?

Sorry to disappoint but, I only speak English.  Boring ol English. I am a Canadian but do not speak French. French is one of the country’s two official languages and was taught in elementary school but optional after grade 10.

It is said that English is the hardest language to learn because there are so many hidden letters and multiple meanings for the same word. It is tricky. Like, Know, No. Where, Wear. Knife – silent K…Knit – silent K again…etc..

It really hasn’t impacted my life not learning another language because I am not an adventurous traveler. I’m pretty much a home body. It doesn’t mean I don’t love going to the Caribbean or Mexico. Sure! Let’s go! I knew I always wanted to be a mom and eventually become a Realtor, so another language was never something I focused on. I didn’t need to.

If the question today was, “Whats a language you wish you learned when you were younger?” I would say Spanish. I love their accent and language. When you greet them they are always so happy and upbeat.

I do know a few words like, hello, how are you, one zero beer please! You know the important stuff, and where’s the bathroom! And of course, Thank you.

It is wonderful to learn a new language. It just gets a little more difficult when we become older, but doesn’t mean we shouldn’t learn. It could have a very positive impact that we didn’t know we possibly could use one day.

Hummm, maybe I should look into taking Spanish lessons. 🤔

Gracias, que tenga un buen día!

Leisure, Mental Health

The best advice I’d give a younger person.

beingmesober

What’s the best advice you’d give to someone younger than you?

The advice I would give to someone younger than me would probably sound a lot like what our parents or grandparents told us.

Don’t rush into marriage, kids, house, dogs etc. Save your money, be independent and so on. This is all good advise but what about living your authentic life?

I would tell them to be true to themselves, love yourself through and through to be able to give your heart to someone else fully and completely. Be who you want to be and don’t let anyone crush your dreams. Its okay to say no. Be mindful of your friends because not everyone is. Don’t trust so easy and ask lots of questions. Don’t be afraid to be silly and crazy every once and awhile, it’s good for our inner child. Listen to your intuition and your parents. We’ve been your age, we know! Always be respectful to everyone that deserves your respect but give yourself the same. Keep learning through life, keep reading and spend more time in nature than on your devices. Learn to communicate and express how you feel, think before you speak or react. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and let go. If you need help, ask.

Lastly, i would tell a younger person that it will all be okay. Just make the right choices, live life to the fullest and take care of you first. Give 100% to yourself before you give 100% to someone else.

Keep smiling 😃